WHY IT IS ALWAYS BETTER TO BE A DODGER FAN THAN A GIANTS FAN …
Nicknames: The Dodgers are named after their fans in Brooklyn who dodged trolleys to get to the game.
The Giants are named after unfortunates with pituitary defects.
Colors: The Dodgers are blue, white and red, like an American flag. The Giants are orange and black, like a godawful kids’ Halloween party.
Crooners: Giants have Tony Bennett. Nice, but the Dodgers had Frank Sinatra.
(although the mints are a nice touch, they’re not nearly powerful enough to mask the the damage).
Dodgers: Jackie Robinson
The Dodgers are The Boys Of Summer. The Giants are The Boys Of BALCO.
The Dodgers’ Mike Scoscia was a master at blocking the plate. Buster Posey’s technique leads to broken bones and further sissification of the game’s rules.
The Dodgers’ Don Drysdale would buzz your ear with a fastball. The Giants’ Juan Marichal would bust your head with a bat.
The Giants played for decades in what is considered the worst venue for baseball in history (Candlestick Park) while the Dodgers played in what is STILL considered The Jewel of Baseball, beautiful Dodger Stadium.
Dodgers: Vin Scully.
Giants: Duane Kuiper.
And finally, the un-toppable topper … 67 YEARS OF VIN SCULLY
Did I mention Vin Scully?
Take that, Jints Fans!!!