Madison Bumgarner is NOT the best pitcher in baseball

Delusional.

That’s the most accurate one-word description I can muster for Giants Fans. Delusional.

They were kind of wacky before but their recent run (three titles in 60 years) has made their eyes take on that Bible Camp gleam that sends chills down your spine. Sure, they won another World Series but they walk around Willie Mays Plaza like their fecal matter has no aroma. I’m here to tell you it does. It stinks. Bad.

After he had what was undoubtedly one of the best postseasons by a pitcher, the folks who live around here have bestowed Cy Young status to their precious MadBum, and it’s delusional.

Reality Check: Mad Bum is not the best pitcher in baseball. He is not the best pitcher in the National League. He is not even the best pitcher in the NL West. Sorry, Jints Fans. I know that’s hard for you to comprehend but we do have empirical evidence that throws ice water into your sleepy face. The truth is, if MadBum were on the Dodgers staff he MIGHT be the Number Three. Maybe. Don’t believe me? Let us compare last year’s MadBum stats against the Dodgers Number Two starter, Zach Greinke. I won’t embarrass you by comparing him to Mr. Kershaw, that would just be cruel. But Giants Fans need to face up to the truth. Here’s the numbers …

madbum

OK, granted, these are very similar lines. Greinke’s winning percentage and ERA are better, but keep in mind, Greinke is not the Dodgers’ ace. You certainly have no argument that MadBum is a better pitcher than Greinke and you would have to have a severe neurological malfunction to even put him in the same sentence as Kershaw. I mean, seriously.

Giants' "Ace," Madison Bumgarner, destroys the home of adorable little woodland creatures, rendering them homeless, with his big bad axe.

Giants’ “Ace,” Madison Bumgarner, destroys the home of adorable little woodland creatures, rendering them homeless, with his big bad axe.

So, Giants Fans, calm down. Sit back and relax. You have a trophy and Bumgarner is a hero. He deserves accolades for his postseason performance. But, let’s not get carried away. In the immortal words of Jimmy Reed, “Big Boss Man, you’re just tall that’s just about all.”

It's true, Zach Greinke doesn't chop down trees, just batters.

It’s true, Zach Greinke doesn’t chop down trees, just batters.

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